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Finding love and marriage with an English man in Thailand

Thursday 5th September 2013 7:57pm

Avoid English pubs and meet an English man online

Many Thai women think of marriage to a foreigner and meeting an English man in Thailand. An English man is now top of the most wanted list for any Thai woman interested in international dating.

In survey after survey Thai woman have confirmed that an English man is the preferred foreign partner when it comes to love and marriage. Why is this? Jeab, a Thai woman from Kalasin province is currently using online dating to find a love partner in England. 'They are gentleman and are quite polite, I would love someday to live in England,' she says. 'But first I must meet my English man.'

In a regular survey conducted among Thai woman from Isaan provinces for a Sunday newspaper in Thailand marriage to an English man continues to be a strong preference among Thai women. English men are followed in the poll by men from America, Australia and Switzerland. 34% of Thai women interviewed said that they would like to marry an English man or husband.

Marriage between a Thai woman and an English man

In the last 12 months there have been two studies on Thai women married to an English man and living in England or the United Kingdom. One was conducted by a post graduate student in the United Kingdom and the other conducted by a mature student in Thailand. Both studies highlighted both the challenges and rewards of relationships between a Thai woman and an English man.

Both studies involved Thai women and English men from nearly thirty different relationships.

Key finding s of both studies showed:

  • There were difficulties faced by Thai women adjusting to life in England.
  • Both the Thai woman and English man involved in the relationship felt that the marriage or relationship was challenged by attitudes and the culture in the United Kingdom. However, this was a key factor in making the marriages or relationships successful.
  • Every Thai woman felt that her financial situation and life quality had improved.
  • Thai women reported a more satisfying sex life. Interestingly it was the researcher from Thailand who unearthed this sensitive titbit of information from the Thai women interviewed.
  • There was a conflict between the report conducted by the English researcher and the researcher in Thailand when it came to violence or abuse in the relationship. In the English study no abuse was reported by any Thai woman while the Thai researcher found evidence of abuse in many relationships. Despite this, each Thai woman in that survey indicated that they were happy that they had married an English man.

Meeting an English man in Thailand

But they key question many Thai women are asking is this. How do you meet English men in Thailand? Carla Boonkong is an international writer for magazines based in Bangkok. She has some answers for Thai women hoping to meet and English men:

'You could try finding in English pub in Bangkok, Phuket, Pattaya or other key foreigner venues but the problem is that you will meet many seasoned English men many of whom have had experience with Thai bar girls', she says. 'On the other hand research is showing many English men are discreetly coming to Thailand and finding their Thai lovers quietly and returning to the UK. It is clear the way to go is through internet dating but it's not just enough to learn some English, put up your best profile and be able to chat in English.'

Carla recommends internet dating but a professional and disciplined way.

Meeting an Englishmen through internet dating.

Carla recommends the following:

If you have your own business, tell your English dating and chat partners online. Research shows that a significantly higher proportion of English men who find Thai wives are self employed or think independently. Even if your English man online is a professional or working class, he will be impressed at the initiative shown by you as a business owner in Thailand even if it is a very small one. This is particularly so that you are a Thai woman as it counters a false stereotype in western countries. Remember, in the past, Napoleon, the famous French Emperor, called England a nation of shop keepers, so play to your advantage if you are self employed or involved in independent business in Thailand.

Find out about life and values in England: 'England is a very fair minded country and while English men are polite they can be pretty blunt and are not fond of too much fuss. It may be that they may find some Thai women are 'beating around the bush' when it is simply the Thai way. Thai woman should learn to speak plainly and confidently when talking with English men.

Do not moan: English men are by and large very fair, decent and honest and expect the same from others. Keep your conversations and communications with English men upbeat and frank and always be responsible.

Learn about English culture: 'Not just know about the Queen and the Royal family. While the vast majority of English people are proud of the Royal family, for some it's not everything about England. There are different types of English men although most have the good values and character which is the reason that many Thai women are interested. So try the following:

  • Find out about UK TV shows online and watch them so that you can see what live is like in England. The most famous TV show in England is 'Coronations Street'. This shows life for working class northern English men and women. Another TV soap called 'Eastenders' shows working class live in London. It might surprise you to learn that in England, the Queen herself watches both programmes.
  • Learn a bit about English history and combine this with a list of places to visit in England. It is a good idea to have as an ambition to make a holiday trip to England and London. It may even fit with your plans to meet the English man of your dreams.

Beyond internet dating - meeting an Englishman

In addition to internet dating, some other approaches are required in order to successfully find the right English man. Carla recommends the following:

Networking with Thai women:'The process of finding a marriage or dating partner from a foreign country such as England is difficult emotionally if you really are sincere and serious about it. Many Thai women who are successful have a friend or a guide. Often it is an older woman who works with the Thai woman searching for the right life partner. Sometimes it can be a friend who is online with you also looking for a foreign partner. The best idea of all is an older woman who has lived in England or has some experience with men from England. So I say try to find out about friends or contacts who have lived in England or who are also interested in finding an English husband. This support can help in many ways.'

Photos and gallery package: 'If you are serious about finding or meeting an English man online, then think very careful about your profile and your photos online. Put together attractive photos that are attractive but also honest about your life in Thailand. Here are some ideas for this:

  • Find colourful backgrounds and different outfits for series of profile photos. Make sure your photos are striking by being off centre, using contrasting colours. You can find a good photo guide on ThaiLoveLines for this. Also have backgrounds in your photos from your life in Thailand so you can explain the context.
  • Produce 20-30 photos for your profile photo gallery showing all aspects of your life. Again make these photos attractive and striking but make sure they are honest and accurate representations of your life in Thailand.

Things you should know - dating an Englishman

Many English men seeking a Thai wife or marriage partner online may have not yet visited Thailand. However at this time in the English media and in particularly the very powerful English 'tabloid' newspapers, there is somewhat of a negative perception of Thai women in England. This extends to some some sections of the population. This is based on the perception of the Thai sex industry and relationships involving Thai bar girls. This also includes negative headlines relating to English men who have married Thai women. Such coverage includes:

  • Reports of Thai women murdering English men for money.
  • Reports of older English men who have been involved in unfortunate incidents in England and who have had girlfriends in Thailand often involved in the sex industry.

Here is some advice on how to deal with this:

  • Make quite clear that you are not a sex worker or bar girl.
  • Explain clearly and politely the modest nature of most Thai women when it comes to sex. Learn more about this issue but be certain that most intelligent English men will understand the situation.
  • Do not tolerate any abusive or condescending comments from any English man online regarding this issue. Remember that the numbers of English men seeking Thai women for marriage is increasing and that Thai English marriages or relationships are considerable more successful than normal marriages or relationships in the United Kingdom.
  • Use your contacts and communications with any English man online to explain Thai culture and the nature of your life and lifestyle in Thailand. There are many principles of traditional Thai culture which will appeal to the right sort of English man. is Thailand’s biggest internet dating site with over 355,000 members and growing rapidly …Begin your search for a Thai girlfriend, wife or partner here.

Two surveys focusing on life for a Thai woman married to an English man in the United Kingdom
Nearly every Thai woman married to an Engihs man and living in the UK says her life is better financially but there are challenges. Thai women are adviced to use intelliegent internet dating to find the right English man online.
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